Today I Ate Paste But It’s Totally Fine Because It Was BROWNIE Paste (With A RECIPE!!)

I have a serious weakness for chocolate. I love it. It is up there with my husband and kids on the List of Things I Love. I love it more than any other candy. I love it more than my husband loves his iPad.
I even love it more than he loves the big, empty box our TV came in that’s been sitting in our garage for three years.

*ahem*

The problem is that I have NO self control around chocolate. None whatsoever. If it is in the house, I WILL eat it. Possibly all in one sitting. Which is ok if it’s a little bit of chocolate, but not so great if it’s, you know, a couple dozen chocolate chip cookies. Because I will eat myself sick on chocolate. And, apparently, I never learn.

By the way, do you shop at Trader Joes? Have you seen these?

Go here: http://angiefoodcake.wordpress.com/?s=chocolatey for more awesome Trader Joe's stuff.

THE DEVIL’S HANDIWORK, I TELL YOU! My poor boys love these but I refuse to buy them because the last time I did I ate pretty much all of them. Not kidding. I think my boys got around 10 each…and then they were gone. I mumbled something about Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and my brother-in-law stealing them, but we all know the truth here. Mommy has a problem.

Anyway, one of the chocolate things that I love is, duh, brownies. But I rarely eat them because I believed that to eat A brownie, one had to make A PAN of brownies. And if I make A PAN of brownies, then I will eat A PAN of brownies. That is altogether too many brownies, so…no brownies for me, mostly.  

Until… (cue choir of angels) … Pinterest.

One night on Pinterest I discovered something that apparently everyone else already knows: You can make a single serving of brownie in a coffee mug, in your microwave. WHAT ELSE ARE YOU HIDING FROM ME, PINTEREST???

So I tried a few recipes, changed up some stuff here and there, and, lo and behold, I now introduce to you the very first Crazed in the Kitchen Recipe Post!!! What I am about to share with you will Blow. Your. Mind. And your diet, but, whatever, right?

So here’s what you need to make one awesome microwave mug brownie:

·      2 tablespoons of melted butter

·      2 tablespoons of milk

·      ¼ teaspoon vanilla extract

·      1 dash salt (this makes me SO nervous—I never know what a “dash” is, so good luck with that)

·      2 tablespoons granulated sugar

·      2 tablespoons Hershey’s Special Dark unsweetened cocoa powder

·      2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

Alrighty, then.

(OK, I feel like under the laws of full chocolate disclosure that I should tell you some things here. First of all, I am hard-core with chocolate—especially dark chocolate. I used dark cocoa powder instead of the regular stuff, and I halved the sugar from the original recipe. This recipe definitely
produces a less-sweet, dark chocolate brownie. So if you prefer sweet, milk chocolate, you might want to use regular cocoa powder and go up to 4 tablespoons of sugar. Also, you’re a sissy.)

So, mix up the butter, milk, vanilla, and salt in a mug. Fancy baker types will have a whisk or something for this task; I use a fork. Add the cocoa powder, fork well. Add the sugar, fork it up. Add the flour…fork it again.

Now here’s where I’m revolutionizing the microwave mug brownie world. Most recipes will tell you to microwave your concoction for 60 seconds, let it cool, then enjoy. But as I looked lovingly into my mug of gooey heaven, I realized something.

This recipe is salmonella-free. No eggs! NO NEED TO COOK IT!!!

So the next step is to just get a spoon and eat it. It’s kind of thick and sticky, so throw a little ice cream in there to loosen it up, if you want. Or milk even, I guess, but that’s kind of boring. I’m not gonna lie—I even tasted it without the flour, and it’s pretty good. I might leave the flour out next time and just call it Brownie Paste.

Possibly the worst photo ever posted on any blog, ever. You're welcome.

And by “next time,” I mean of course, “at the next commercial break in The Bachelorette.”

Enjoy!